back-home arrow mini logo April 29, 2009
Homicide in Vienna

VIENNA, VA - A young computer programmer was found today at the bottom of the Potomac River, weighed down by some OSTP documents. Police suspect foul play. The body had no IDs on it. We only know that the victim was a computer programmer because his body had, slung across its back, a backpack containing a very dog eared copy of a Linux textbook. Apparently, his aggressors were pure theorists who had no use for such a book. Hidden among the pages of the book, police found a mysterious map.

A bartender at the Vienna Marriott claims that she saw the young computer programmer speaking to a Signor Presqui, who was in town for a convention of academics (Workshop on Quantum Information Science (QIS) April 23-25). The bartender, who has now joined the witness protection program, claims that she heard Signor Presqui tell the computer programmer at one point:

You find me funny because I run 3 Caltech syndicati-instituti? What do ya mean, funny? Let me understand this cause, I don't know maybe it's me, I'm a little fucked up maybe, but I'm funny how? I mean, funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh... I'm here to fuckin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?

A whiteboard, apparently inadvertenly left behind by Signor Presqui in his hotel room, had the following mysterious cyphers written on it:

Loidi dice:

The universe is a quantum computer

Backholes are quantum computers

Plants are quantum computers

back-home arrow mini logo April 29, 2009
© 2009, Artiste